The Brain Buddha newsletter helps you live your best life by focusing on the 4 Pillars: Your Mind, You Money, Your Body & Your Relationships.
In this issue:
- Brain Buddha: 4 Ways Childhood Trauma is Affecting You as an Adult
- Money Buddha: I’ll Take Boring Over Exciting Any Day
- Body Buddha: This Former Navy SEAL Though He Was Dying, It Wasn’t What He Thought…
- Relationship Buddha: Why is it harder to make friends as an adult?
- Brain Buddha’s Visual of the Week
BRAIN BUDDHA 🧠
4 Ways Childhood Trauma is Affecting You as an Adult
I just finished reading the book “Can’t Hurt Me” by David Goggins. (It’s a great read, highly recommend)
I won’t give away everything in the book, but as a child Goggins lived a traumatizing life.
While many of us may not experience the same level of trauma, I’ve found we all suffer some kind of trauma in our own ways that still affect us in adulthood. Some people don’t even realize it.
These are four ways childhood trauma may be affecting you as an adult:
- The False Self: Children who don’t get the love they need from their parents or those raising them, create a false self of what the child thinks their parents will love. By doing this, it suppresses the feelings you feel in order to get your emotional needs met.
- Victimhood thinking: Ever say things to yourself like: “You don’t deserve this.” or “You’re a loser, you’re worthless.” Victimhood thinking is the manifestation of this negative self-talk.
The main article shares a wonderful tip for Victimhood thinking: Instead of thinking of yourself as a victim, change it to thinking of yourself as a survivor. It’s so much more empowering.
I know growing up, I had a lot of negative self-talk and victimhood thinking.
- Passive-Aggressiveness: Anger expressed inappropriately or in violet ways can lead to a child believing anger is a bad emotion and must be suppressed.
Suppressing anger or not being able to express anger in a healthy leads to expressing your feelings through passive aggression, which doesn’t resolve the anger you feel inside.
- Passivity: When a child is neglected or abandoned, the child buries their feelings and fears, leading to abandoning themselves.
When this happens, it’s likely cause of not living to your potential.
MONEY BUDDHA 💵
I’ll Take Boring Over Exciting Any Day
I came across a personal finance & investing thread a few days ago (unfortunately, I can’t find it now).
The main discussion was someone looking for some “exciting” investments for people to recommend.
A lot of the suggestions were either sarcastic or garbage investment picks.
I hope anyone reading that thread doesn’t really put their hard-earned money in those suggestions.
It got me thinking how, I much prefer a “boring”, yet proven, investing strategy versus something “exciting” (which is more like speculating & gambling).
I’ll take nice dividend-paying stocks any day (and proven Index ETF’s) instead of something for a cheap thrill.
BODY BUDDHA 🧘🏻♀️
This Former Navy SEAL Thought He Was Dying…
Referring back to the book “Can’t Hurt Me” by David Goggins, David is a former Navy SEAL, he’s also a highly self-motivated person who pushed his body past normal comfort zones to extreme levels of performance.
However, one day, his body wasn’t feeling right.
After years of pushing his body, he felt something was seriously wrong.
He went to consult doctors and the doctors could not figure out what was wrong.
But David KNEW something was not right.
He was sure he was dying.
In reality, the cause of his discomfort was something many people suffer from but rarely understand or pay attention to…
…he had pushed his body so hard for so many years, his muscles were so tightly wound, it was causing pressure on his blood circulation.
The solution, was a matter of stretching and loosening the tightness in his muscles.
You don’t have to push your body to the levels David did, most people these days have the same issues caused from sitting at a desk or working at a computer all day.
Whether you do weight-lifting, jogging or don’t do much exercise at all, stretching and loosening the muscles is critical to long-term health.
Personally, I’ve Pilates to be a healthier way to stretch and loosen tight muscles versus Yoga, where I’ve seen people do more damage.
If you sit around all day like me, you probably feel tightness in your hip flexors. This can help you open up your hips.
RELATIONSHIP BUDDHA ❤️
Why is it harder to make friends as an adult?
After living overseas for a number of years, I moved my family back to Canada a couple of years ago.
While I still have some close friends from my school days here, it’s definitely been hard to form new friendships.
Now, I understand there’s science to explain this (makes me feel better it’s not just me…):
- As most adults are too busy with their own lives (whether it be kids, ageing parents, work, etc), adults just don’t have the free time to spend on friends with their hectic lives. Research says it takes 50 hours to make a casual friend and 200 hours to make a close friend
- If you really want to make new friends, you’ll have to be more organized and have more intent to make new friendships. Meaning making time to spend with friends, organizing group activities, etc).
VISUAL OF THE WEEK
*Disclaimer: The Brain Buddha publishes financial information and does not offer personalized or individualized financial advice. Please consult your own financial advisor for specific advice to your own situation.
The statement and expression of opinion is not an offer or solicitation to buy or sell the financial products mentioned.
The Brain Buddha and it’s parent & subsidiary brands & companies do not accept any liability whatsoever for any direct or indirect loss arising from the use of any information shared on this website, emails or any content sharing channels.
The Brain Buddha may also include links to products where we may receive a commission as an affiliate if you purchase from the vendor. We recommend you do your own research & due diligence before purchasing.
Get the Weekly Brain Buddha
Get weekly content on nourishing your brain and living your best life.
Each week covers our 4 Pillars: Your brain (mental wellness), your body (physical health), your money (personal finances & investing) and your relationships.
Not sure if The Brain Buddha newsletter is for you? Check out The Brain Buddha Manifesto (opens in new tab) to see if our mission resonates with you.